I was at yoga this morning, and this large sweaty breathy man plopped himself next to me. I could hear his loud and quick breaths as I lay in shavasana. He irritated me immediately. His mere presence invaded my quiet, small but strong space. When we were asked by the teacher to spread out our hands his hands overlapped mine due to their size. I was required to drop mine down first in order to avoid his. I needed to move out of his way. I needed to make my already small self even smaller to make room for him. I needed to retain my controlled breath and composure in his aggressive space. When he kicked up to do a handstand I could hear everything, even the thump of his feet back on the ground. When I kicked up to do a handstand, you could barely hear me move, yet I was THERE, in full knowledge with 10 years of yoga & 20 years of dance behind my belt, yet his confidence exceeded mine.
Rewind to yesterday, at work during "happy hour" with coworkers where one woman was asked to identify who was our demographic for our product. She answered so perfectly and articulately, with such grace, calm and composure, while the men hurled questions that made them "stand out". They asked questions that they didn't have the answers to, but SHE did. They continued to ravage and hurl their predatory selves and questions at her while she continued to smile and answer in grace. They were feeding off her, she filled a gap in themselves, she filled their nasty hunger for information that SHE innately had. She didn't need the data, she knew the answers because simply, SHE IS. The men breathed hard, lunged forward, hungry for answers. Taking from her. Violating her knowledge & SHE self. As I sat back and watched the predators attack their prey, I realized she was being taken for her knowledge but not GIVEN anything in return.
Why are men allowed to walk this earth so furiously and with utter and complete confidence, savage, taking everything in their path. And giving nothing back in return? Why am I consistently being violated in every arena of my life, while they, not so smoothly, do yoga next to me, in complete and utter confidence?
Everything with a splash of Feminist Critique & some story telling.
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